I am about to graduate soon.
Probably during the Jan or Feb of 2016.
But, before that,
Let me go home and have my mind to be clear.
What am i going to take the next step?
Which way shall i choose so that i wont regret in the future?
.
.
.
Shall i let my own history repeat and have another 6 years again?
or
This time, i shall force myself to pull myself away from the trap as early as possible?
Nevermind, no matter how or what
You are not included in my future plan.
i told myself to stay strong
i told myself to stay strong
i told myself to stay strong
i told myself to stay strong
i told myself to stay strong
i told myself to stay strong
i told myself to stay strong
i just told myself to stay strong
however, i am not
i am just an ordinary girl
who look extraordinary in people's eyes
i am tired
i am sad
i am childish
i am exhausted
sometimes i wonder what and why am i rushing
i need nothing much
i just need a hug
i just need:"no matter how, i am always behind you"
i just need someone because i am not that strong nor dependence that people think
i just want to go home
i just want my mommy, my daddy, my brother and my sisters
because they always treat me as kid, as a little girl
hey you!
thanks for treating me like a kid or little girl
thanks for not ignoring me when i had my temper on you ((sorry*100
thanks for advising me on work and on my life road
thanks for everything :)
but still, you are very annoying xD
"Yea.. It must be a habit." silently whispered to myself
I might be not believing in marriage anymore, but I still believe in love. Sometimes, I wondered. Well, maybe I am not deserved to have someone to hug me tight, to kiss me. It's not that I am dry, but who doesn't need a soul mate, right?
Y IS IT SO HARD FOR ME?!
I .JUST. WANNA. CONCENTRATE ON MY FINALS
AND THEN
GET A NICE. GOOD. REST RIGHT AFTER THAT
DURING THE WINTER HOLIDAYS
IN MY WARM HOME SWEET HOME
Malaysians不管去在哪裡,都會跟人家講:"Malaysia not good lahh! Govertment sucks! Social security xia shui! Got kaum problem. Bla Bla Bla, Bla Bla Bla~~"
但是,當國家(不是政府!)需要我們時,各地Malaysians幾乎都會站起來,哪怕只是一點釘力量;
Taiwaneses會在國內光明正大的討論"臺灣這裡不好,那裡不好;但是會一致對外說:"Taiwan is a very good country and you MUST agree with me!!!我們有最好吃的美食,最好看的風景,是最有人情味的國家, SO, IT'S A MUST FOR YOU TO AGREE WITH ME!" 當然,國家需要他們的時候,他們也會站起來,甚至人口不比我們多的他們,力量比我們更強大!尤其是他們的媒體,比偵探還勁!(Sorry lahhh, Malaysia的媒體不可以亂亂來的囉!丟了飯碗事小,忽然間不屬於這個空間才是大件事囉!)
但是!
再怎樣不同
We are still Asians.
Asians最大的弱點就是死要面子!
所以,當一個英文48強又48 outstanding的人(let's name it A)出現在一個英文沒有很好又或者不是很愛講英文的人(let's name it B)面前時,
即時A is trying to be friendly, and he or she did try hard to speak Chinese with B, but sorry,
B一開始會覺得A這個人很不錯!可是,當A and B開始變熟,B會開始討厭A.
WHY?!
又講他們變熟了?!
原因就在於"他們變熟了"
當他們開始變熟了,相處模式開始不尷尬了
A開始不絞盡腦汁去想這個字中文怎麼講
B開始覺得是怎樣?!一直在show off你英文很勁是嗎?!
B開始討厭A,
and A don't know why the hell was B who suddenly dislike him or her
but, kayyyy~ fine!
you dislikey me, i dislikey u too lahh~
DEAL.
所以
A跟B不再是朋友了
換個角度想
如果今天A跟B相處
A持續跟B用中文交談,可是當中穿插some vocabularies
然後問說:"誒!這個英文單字中文怎麼說?"
And then continue by using the chinese word just learned
B虛心向學:"喔!原來這個詞的英文是這個。"
兩個人交換意見的時候用"我覺得"或"I think that"
而不是"你錯了!" or "NoNoNoNoNo, you CANT think this way"
這個世界是否會美好一點?
sorry to say, but!
大部分臺灣人和Malaysia's typical Chinese都是換個角度想前的B
也不是說我沒有跟西方人相觸過
好吧~
目前不多,就兩個而已
但是
西方國家回來的華人or English educated Malaysians?
Definitely YES!
BUT!
sorry, again, to say
you guys are seriously over confidence!
therefore, you guys are A before standing in others shoes
I m seriously very very DULAN now!
WTC?!
Haha?!
Dont waste my time man!
I am here to study and get ready to graduate when i should graduate!
Not here for you guys to use your really no-leadership skill to order me!
I am sorry to say
BUT!
I am not that kind of person who play a great role of teammate
IF you dont make me feel like respecting you!
Excuse me!
I shut my mouth up didnt mean that I didnt give a damn in it, okay?
You, a stupid who humiliating Gemini, as a leader,
can you plan daily agenda before you start our practice?
Not suddenly spot a problem and then everybody stunt there and start discussing.
Hello?!
There arent much time to reach the day
These few days are for us to practice!
Not to change movement suddenly!
There wasnt a really big problem if one or two cant attend the practice every single day
Everyone have their own things to do!
Not everyone like you
goyang kaki in the room and just plan for ONLY ONE PERFORMANCE!
Can you imagine how people have to divide their time just to attend a small practice
whereby sometimes we were just there to talk nonsense?
What to you mean by asking people to take a day off from her work to come practice?
This performance DAI SAI is it?
What to you mean by "be right there at sharp 11pm" when I had told you like hundred years ago that we have class outside in Taipei till 9.45pm?
You think your taiwan traffic rule very loose is it?
You think a bus can fly like 200km/hr is it?!
Seriously!
I am here to study!
I join activities because I am just willing to help!
Not to been order by you guys like I have no feelings!
Dont forget you were the one who begging me to join your performance!
It wasnt me to beg you to let me join your performance!
PLEASE MAKE THIS CLEAR!!!!!
Last two things that I really dislike about you!
What do you mean by people cant pat your head but you can!
If you dislike people pat your head, then you dont pet others head too!
Second!
Stop acting like you are a protections-needed-little-girl!
I AM SO SORRY TO SAY
BUT I LOOK DOWN ON THIS KIND OF GIRL!
YOU ARE NOT APPROVED BY ME TO ACT CUTE, ACT ADORABLE, ACT NEED MY CONSOLATION IN FRONT OF ME!
FUCK OFF FROM MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
20_妳們!!MUACKZZZ!! Thank you so much for supporting me for every single stuff no matter where you guys are or where i am! I cant imagine life without you guys.. I might just fall and never stand up again.. Other than "thank you", I really dont know what can I said to express my highest and deeply gratitude and appreciation. I SIMPLY JUST LOVE YOU GUYS TTM!! :') 22_除了朋友們,對我最好的人非我家人莫屬。所以每次回家第一件事,一定會先來個大大的擁抱加親親!面對在乎的人,我的感謝說不出口。只能用文字表達,心存激動的感激!可是,我是真的真的真的真的真的很愛你們!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ 23_不用看別人了!就是你們這兩個愛欺負我的傢伙!感到榮幸吧!世界上就只有妳們兩個可以欺負我~~不過,欺負我要付出很大的代價!妳們!要!一!輩!子!保!護!我! >:] BFF mah~ right? *wink! But still, THANK YOU for being there 24/7 :') ❤❤